I don’t know who you am (fingered fools) / missing minds eye (drugs were a bad choice) / locally originated milk products (old people staring out of retirement home windows) / wretched beast on my front lawn / god spoke to me and you in dulcet tones / Cigarette Pig on the tobacco farm / maybe it was a bad idea to show my new girlfriend the VHS footage of a voodoo ceremony / king of voodoo came to say hello etc/maybe I really am retarded like momma said / I would keep you at arms length, but my arms are very small (akin to dinosaur arms) /directing vituperative language at the homecoming queens / Rolling Stones t-shirt on Bleeding Tom Mills was covered in gut fluff and spilt pieces of English cheddar / / I lost my confidence in my ability to draw accurate cartoon depictions of ‘Popeye’ /slitbreeze – I sold all of my cassettes and spent the money on dope and carrot cake / somehow, my impression of the USA changes every time I dip my head in the water(finger fanny food) / accidental clock / sometimes her fingers melt in the summer (Miss Rubber Thumb)/ the king of pencils is writing things down/ / stupid Wednesday / the day the helicopters lost their way / Jagger in the summer (with sweaty lips- face + fanny) / Jagger on TV / the return of Victorious Baboo/ I am a Victorian gentleman with thoroughly modern fingers / my beast, your place / you’re only human once a week, John / the potato that lives in the ground./no finer sight than a monkey with fat little paws and a big curly tail / eat some food and then make love to your ex-wife / I trained my chimp to play the Sega Mega Drive / I am (the) vulture tonight /the modern conman said ‘surely we have all experienced the the trauma of our wives and girlfriends being eaten by the television?’ / The 80s The The The (FO) / little old ladies who might have joined the IRA / pessimistic killer (‘but what if they catch me??’) /the day Bleeding Tom Mills finally joined the IRA / greasy harvest (Get Back Loretta!!!) / I am rather proud of my cardboard-cut-out face / the joy of realising your girlfriend is still alive (despite hearing reports to the contrary)/murdered dog catalogue / I showed you the back of my itchy hand / / you should never kiss a gypsy’s eyeball / afraid to take a dip in shark-infested swimming baths / there aren’t enough goalkeepers in America/ I am most certainly not going to poke you looking like that / afraid of cocks / swapping peaches for eggs (etc.)/gettin’ pregnant in America / did you stay down in the swamp for the holiday season?/juicy lobotomy / Santa Clause and the Hulk Bubble / Richard Lewis is telling the truth (gypsy) / smoking something called a ‘bone’ / the day my head toppled off and fell on to the carpet (and was subsequently licked by a dog) / the changing mind patterns of Memory Man/I only collect Greek Penis, of course / the man who fell in love with his own shadow/ buttery fascist ./ I dream of scarred goblins / Italian toe nails /who would have guessed that the rainbow would taste like rotting chicken / sitting in an Egyptian living room in 1988 / Siamese dream baby/I just witnessed Gary Wilmot trying to communicate with a walnut named Gary / sidecar death squad / boy, have you ever tried common deer? / sometimes her tits taste so sweet / rustic and chubby / spitting at corpses of fascists / it’s not a hat, it is actually part of his head / fresh produce being handled by sweaty old men from Devonshire / my new realistic girlfriend /only children can play computer games on-line (Bleeding Tom Mills is a child) / Argentinean blindness / I have never actually met my wife in person /down-town ninjas