Monday 29 July 2013

Birth Control

'Birth Control'

'London Before They Dropped Me Off'

'My Glory - September 2009'





/ the year they let my brother believe he was a space alien / / I have always been very fond of driving in fog / hillbilly poem rips the mickey out of the city folks / I did not shoot my father-in-law’s mistress / she left small bags of dirt on my front porch /now it is time to listen to cassette number 463 (‘Jam in the morning’ by ‘King Fatso’) / shrugging your shoulders during the opera / I want all the perks of being a gangster but I don’t want to live with the perpetual threat of getting killed / barnyard beauty / Is it Nautical Almanac? / animal magnets / in love with a belching teenager /  learning to play piano despite having three hands / lady flower - my father was a secret ladyboy / the question ‘is it OK to be a luddite?’ is slightly less pertinent now than it was 10 years ago  love in the time of cholera / I have always felt uneasy in the presence of ectomorphic people / glad to be a bastard! /the boy who shaved his own beard off and lived inside an abandoned bubble gum machine / fat liar on moon /  she smells of gun flowers./ there was a rumour circulating that my father had played in the band "Billy Barf and the Vomitones". / go home and wash your tongue / I still love the blob / hats off to chicken and gorilla / Maxwell’s demon / his (t) list is merely a reflection of what culture he is imbibing at any given time /no, I am not China’s richest man / He-She Ra (even cartoons have to be PC these days) / political correctness is just wrong (nacho supper) /  / millennium limp / dust Jacqui miss Nag Magoo / shapeless walrus / I travelled to Mars but forgot my packed lunch / I don’t miss Magdalene Magoo /should be carry on munching on the Amanita mascara? / mushy dung – daddy’s potion / calescence corpse (burning on the heath) / rubescent-faced astronaut / feeding candy to the the gaunt astronaut  /modern sludge /broken babies and shapeless teeth / Jandek 20001 / pissed  we spent Christmas morning watching restored footage of the 1934 punk group 'The Shifty rascals’ / Christmas mourning (I hate stuffing etc.)./ my dad was not a member of the Cowboy Orchestra /the day he sold his eyes to a clown / deformed orchestra conductor /  thunder tits / Jackson and the astronauts/and then the museum curator coughed up some precious artefacts / a hand drawn drawing of Bobby Vee / Falklands love child / encyclopaedic knowledge of the life of Bumper Baby / here is an image for your head this morning:- a man wearing red lipstick and a little funny hat, chucking vegetables into the air / a man with chimpanzee arms is wrestling my baby brother..i might just have to intervene / list of flowers we didn’t eat at the funeral / gorgeous paws/

Films of David Lynch

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Red Behind



'Red Behind'


 I painted your lips when you was dead (gnathic children of Mars) / homophobic pastry / we shake hands with kids who are smaller than us / milk man on ketamine / I was lost, but just for a while, I was saved..but where am I now? / Sam’s ideas (babies who live in worn-out rockets) /I discovered the ancient tool box, and in it was a written note which I decided not to read / Janus Harris was the cream of punk (or was that queen of punk?)  /no use for  sundry ape / dead astronaut on the shag pile carpet / evil spaceman apologist / ghetto beats / prince of caramel /  toffee-nosed holocaust/  kingdom of flies (dead flies) /  / three reasons that Pink Donkey is better than White Monkey / my son-in-law wiped his plate clean with my best Armani silk shirt.. I quickly took away all of his toys and dumped them in the river Seine / inside a bachelor’s kitchen / gender rebellion / last of the deaf poets  / dead end banquet ./ dead children on the moon / melting gods / MY my daughter-in-law insisted I remove my rubber mask before entering her bedroom /  / forgotten teeth / I left my front teeth on the back of the bachelor’s moped / broken walnuts / invisible hairy ghost  / I have always had a fondness for kooky murderers / I have always loved you, killer / the man who couldn’t take to aliens / pansy in a lift with a bunch of hard-line criminals etc. / ghetto glue / the ABC string (sizeable tits) /what makes you think it is acceptable to glue your eyebrows back on? / binge thinking / somebody has just written my name on the back of Chris Dog-Nut’s face / she insists on making love with a python draped across her shoulders / prized skull / I made love whilst clasping a python in my right hand / she always makes love with a python wrapped around her neck / ‘I haven’t had sex for over 3 minutes’ complained the sex addict / I am addicted to tickling my own ball bag /modern scorn /blind man sniffing around the abandoned farm  /we quickly realised we were in a post-apocalyptic movie /  I stole your nick-name (camped out all night with Trevor McDonald) / Big Ted was a paedophile / car boot baby / orange valves / shallow-fired love nest /  Skid Row Beauties / UR the guy from XX / theatre of invisible players (the milk zombie is back from the cheesy grave) /I melted cheese onto my dreams / Dutch gravy / John lost  it on the last train home/European eroticism is number 01 / killed by a falling star!! / Egyptian people on Mars / toothless beauty queen/bath house blues / ‘Kipper Jacket’ by Trojan Ollie and the Fall of Toy Town is a 3 start cassette at best, mother / felt-tip empire / jewellery box blues/there were only enough Mae West’s for the children and the bloke dressed as a gorilla / sometimes, the fish need eating and the meat needs chucking out/cheese on toast and a bucket of parasites /  gorilla called Barry / you tried to pour scorn on me but you accidentally poured onion gravy on me by mistake / something must have gone terribly awry if he doesn’t get his allotted amount of pussy  / I don’t eat meat, I just like it from time to time /shot down by Pegasus / grandpa’s fangs / /swollen units / the carefree whore / /Oswald Rivaldo and the loose girls of Ford factory / classic bruiser /  juicy sex horror story volume XXX /shopping for shoulder (we tickled the panther’s belly) / rubber Charlie / ten gallon Jackson / yeah no Jackson 6 /  Sid Chilli, con man in a  cardigan / wrapped head of dead man / crayon baby / the day they shaved their teeth  /My Princess Diana fantasy file book 03:- 1. Princess Di was my lover, friend and sister  / careful with that vile of deadly disease, son / T: mumbling Jesus /pansy in the snake pit / what to do with remaining teeth  / I shaved off my grandson’s beard / Roger, Dick and Nelly are not real names, Jack / Christmas men / gay fellowship / picked up a lesbian at Dusseldorf Choir Christmas concert /feet smell of onion bhaji /  Don Carlos and the African Jazz Astronauts / Blake Adams and the filthy lizards  – Moosewood Apple Woodcock / shake down the fraggle/ crippled astronauts / theatre of menace and hatred / hart attack on last train home / crippled lineage / luxury apocalypse / T: I am not from Bangkok / please enjoy your brand-new plastic Jesus / Slurpy Jesus back in town /swollen bones/ Amy Winehouse is not alive / Chemical Addiction bum – Amy Whitehouse (experimental jazz cassettes left in a shoes box which was discovered by my septuagenarian girlfriend) / yes sexy blonde woman, it’s a bum bath..hey hey / y’all come to my shack and eat some grits and have some orgy now /  I checked my pulse in Stockholm / stocky Jesus  - the musical / we found the Croesus flicking through a coffin brochure..he was focusing on the gold coffins..of course!! / kid of the Congo / Belgian Congo horror show on-lookers / Saturday night neeps / if Tom is reading this it means he has discovered that… (deleted / conventional bruiser / studying the death squad / shake down the fragile / cooking up some ‘great shit’ / cemetery shag / shagged before supper / jazz baby heat wave / birth of a stranger / stuck on a strange woman /Pop Larrikin and the deep-fried potatoes / shocked by the lack of good breath amongst my ancestors /   sports casual sex / severe lack of good breeding in Village of Damned / city centre  Hercules / missing teeth love triangle / greasy baby / booing gee the unbridled joy of casual sex /my boyfriend has a morbid fear of roller coasters / my boyfriend has a morbid fear of radiators /  Johnny Death-Ray and the Holocaust Puppets / I finger you in your dream / ..it stems from a morbid fear of Der Sensenmann  / sexual inclination towards wellington boot / Once I saw him at the front of the stage with this naked old woman and he was shoving his Vaseline finger in and out of her backside to the rhythm of the music while ringing this bell at the same time/ paint my  human / hot eyeballs / / yes, I am a lunatic and I am going to marry your mother /  lunatic /TV Smith and the Lost Crows / why didn’t I switch the TV off? (why did I wait for my boyfriend to do it?) /  missing lovers 1 through 2 / elegant spastic / girl , you’re a better man than me / gentrification shy horse (in pub) / rainbow-coloured corpse made the children happy /miraculous comb-over / shedding skin in 1987 / I saw you coming with the shit slit / Christmas in Tupelo / I don’t need you anymore, so I made you get off the bike / the pain of being a balding Rasta/ Bleeding Tom Mills has absolutely no social skills / I can’t wait to attend my first ever horse autopsy (I’m gonna take notes and everything) / the childish Alaskan yeti hunter is dating my kid sister / I spent much of Tuesday inspecting  the naked Japanese people in my sister’s back garden / performing BMX tricks on the moon / Black Nelson and the starving children of Bleeding Tom Mills (shite web) / we knew for sure my boss had gone crazy when he attempted to communicate with a jar of pickles / cat on the caravan roof (lid) / dandruff legacy / Utopia death squad / an hour of sad stories set to jazz-rave music / you shallow-fired your baby / hunting for chubby people / ticklish orchestra conductor / Utopian bones / lessons learned in Utopia / street horse carry-out / boneless boogie / leftover dance positions / Bobby’s child / sucking on devil eggs / hello Chris, welcome to the fourth hour of sitar music / gone with the fart/ damaged imitation  / people who play video games need to spend more time with their families / greasy remains / we handed him a towel for him to mop his sweaty countenance / section b: waiting for Dumbo / I sometimes have sex / ghetto toes / the brains were in the garbage can / Irish face/ coconut whistle / yellow traffic / Hercules and me / biblical teeth / is VV acronym for Viscous Vortex? / damp hat / deathly legacy (food defer) / turtle box / box of cash for Daddy Rosh Youth / lung trumpet / it’s not every day you meet an incompetent bearded man / jewels of the death house 

Nico

'The End'

 teacher’s horse / what happened to blistered chicken? / summer bullets/  contour shapes / pub rock hair implants / kinky infauna / ecstatic pipe /ill Ayden’s over-boiled army / Spaniel Candy / Dutch rubber / fold-up corpse / dinner-time pipes / sorting out the ducks from other birds (are ducks actually birds?) / can ducks fly? / I was refused admittance to the duck hunt because of my failure tow ear the correct hat (with flaps covering the ears) / pickled obstacles/the floating gob / property of Kid Oracle (in paisley pyjama suit) ./ do penguins have chins? / Memories of a smashed-up tortoise/please return stolen birds to their owners / king of being gay /peach tree in my bathroom / sucked on a modern problem over  anachronistic dinner/

Low Numbers

'Low Numbers'

'Before Summer Sex'

'Pipe Oh Pipe'

'Black Corine'



    I took off my cardigan and threw my arms around the sunshine baby / dead before dusty eyes / discreet hard-on / sports centre whores / we mistook the blind man’s bell for the dinner bell / dinner time with tramp /flicking fag ash onto a Canadian hairdresser / crippled walnut / shoe dogs / he took the death of Mickey Mouse better than expected / and no one loves Mickey Mouse’s mouth organ music  anymore / bingo wind / Trevor looks like he needs a bath and something to eat / dancing corpse / we shot the corpse in the head and urinated on the 10 dollar bill  /antique fish finger / that faintly erotic silver bird that kept flying into my head in my youth (sir, I am now 74 years old and my fingers have grown wrinkly and thin) / furry features of fur boy) / children in space/  the breed of kids who had no thumbs / the sordid wars / soiled pants of scared rejected officer / knock off effect / the long overdue written history of the crippled walnut / pre-conditioned kitten / people whop like computers are usually stupid ./ a weekend of stubble (New moves -  crippled mouth) /there is no disputing in my house that Daffy Duck is a twat / queer ancient fellas /  shagging your sister’s boyfriend / / twisted space-age projections / beautiful blister /  I recorded over my ‘Concert for Tina’ cassette with some home-made concertina jazz) / forgotten teeth left wrapped in a used yellow sock (off yellow, actually) / White Witch Project / projecting images of dead soldiers onto the school wall / black pleasure /  dark pleasures of the BS Cowboy Tribe /  I insist that my soldiers dress in leather and wear eyeliner / walked into the Nevada desert..keept on walking..kept on walking. Eventually I encountered Captain Beefheart having an intense discussion with Jandek.  I caught snippets of the conversation. I  concluded, from the bits of conversation I heard, that Captain Beefheart was trying to convince Jandek that it is indeed possible to make love even if you are dead/ pipe piss/put your hands down and feel this fur / my top 3 favourite new bands this month are:- 3. Errol Blackspot and the Teeth 2. Lance Henrikson and the Swollen Glands 1. Triumphant Joe and the Smog Chasers / soiled women at the dinner tale / Lance Armstrong’s new boil /chubby children  on the moon (*PR) / jazz blankets /  I boiled the chicken today  /leaked out foe haven  /be my tiger tonight  tiger / river boat whore / let’s shave off our beards and pretend top be children   /Bartholomew’s spoilt features were still delightful to most ladies / dungeon baby / soiled army pants /before dinner I retold my famous story about the eccentric solider who kept a pork pie under his army helmet / / the long-forgotten fable of Hitler and his underground bummer / Errol Sheath and the Cobwebs / why are cobwebs sticky? / is it still illegal to smoke fish? / prison lips/ I tried to tie my dog to the back of the passing truck / small people in Munich / black space pod queen /  secret vinegar (NE) / hanging around with men who don’t know how to shoot their rifles properly / smoking cigars and munching on pickled kidneys / big boy in the face / I decided to distribute clay effigies of my penis to my friends and my friend’s families / rejected corpse (God is a harsh lord) / most Christians prefer mushroom omelettes to cheese and ham omelettes / woodpecker in a cuckoo tree / Clark Daniels and Lilly Fingers / walking through space with some aliens etc. / my son requested a Michael Jackson tape for his birthday, but I got him a ‘The Slit’s tape instead (and ) / cat in a mushroom field / deadly secretions of the Dermot Wax Worm / big man’s small finger / killer’s side-parting / jungle pastries / the peculiar feeling you get when lost in space / discreet dandruff / queen of swans! / industrial gums / those delightful albino swans /pansy feet / velvet ape worm / please come see my list of lost Chinese children/alphabetic teeth / video tapes of lost Chinese children playing in the background/I lost my rag with Baby Feet /  I have always had a strong fascination with hairy babies / doomed to cry tonight /ten or twelve Chinese people staring out of the broken window of a crashed spaced shuttle / inside the mind of a Pakistani foot soldier /here comes Candy Thumbs / clean Beatle (Jackie Morrison ) / a steady stream of piss trickled into the labourer’s mouth as he lay prone on the muddy ground / pampering the corpse / I didn’t expect to see Alpine smog / snorting on the way home from Pigsville / the girl with permanent tuna breath / death of a minor actor /  / my grandma’s crenate bed posts / don’t skeletons wearing postiches look funny??  /how can one get to sleep with God moving his furniture round? / horse pipes/ don’t forget the god-damned apple sauce this time / Jesus in the igloo / I put my swollen tongue on ice / Polish dentist writing poetry and shaving their heads because they are in the middle of a heat wave and their hair made their heads feel too hot / are you doing over time? / pancake wrist action web poetry club / I piled up my Arab Strap cassettes next to the plastic sandwich / corpse ennui / corpse in the heatwave (zombie in the heatwave) / coated in hope / coconut teeth  /electronic gore/ F Gore / spastic trick pony / kitten coated in diesel / perfumed teeth (2) / helicopter teeth / jazz fist / went to heaven with Turkey David at Xmas / poor man’s duffel bag

Wilkommen to the U.S. nineties, two-thousand

'I Don't Love You'

'Who Are These people?'

'Pegu Sin'

'A Pear'

'Wilkommen to the U.S. nineties, two-thousand'

'The Christmas Octopus'

Be calm sweet pea.  The Irish do not know the answer(s).  Test yourself in elated atmosphere/heightened environment. Awareness of what is going on around you and others. Sugar fix. You need more friends, especially homosexuals.



deformed shoes / Kid Oracle and the Dutch Masters / what the hell do you wanna live under the ground for? /slag hut blues / octopus lament / caravan corpse/100 year + 2 day war /ten risks involved with sending humans into space (list deleted by colonel Eric Blimp) / tangerine creamy incisions/  slags in the breakfast hut/tickled corpse/  I have demon –sized rats crawling around my kitchen / Captain Beefheart vs. the Grunt People / crying at the breakfast table / Remote hand-job / Bleeding Tom Mills’ breath stinks of peanuts /   I named my daughter after Tina Turner’s 15th best tune /teenage jelly / psychedelic happening under my bed / Bleeding Tom Mills (AKA The Laughing Gob) list of his favourite albums of all times:- 1. ‘Sludge Daddy’ by Captain Beefheart and the Unbelievable Rewind; 2. ‘Purple Kittens Taste the Best’ by Captain Pansy and the Infant Tics; 3. ‘Slap-Happy Janitors’ by Queen Biscuit and the Pretty Kitten / RLS baby / I repeatedly told Amy Whitehouse to leave that junk alone. She wouldn’t listen (white headphones) / Peter Doherty is skanky and I will not allow him to date my daughter Jane Scrawl / long-forgotten trousers/keeping Michael at bay with a flaming stick/inserting peas into a skeleton’s nostrils / hello I am trying to locate the whereabouts of the Chicken Gypsy / Kid Oracle and the knowledgeable gypsy / Kid under the carpets / disturbed by mental image of the Queen’s whiskers/ deformed by the future /psychodaddy / singing along to Gram Parson’s tunes on a bus which was put out of action in 1988 / psycho bubble tripping on chimp juice (not too many people are aware of the psychedelic properties of chimp juice) / Jewish chimps/ calm people in the back pages of the New Testament / golden psychology (cheeky channels) / doesn’t Stewart Cliff’s new fish tattoo look shit!!!(this is a statement, not a question..ok?) / pillbox hat chat (dog sandwich) / the undisputable champion of Earth / slugging it out with a disabled grizzly bear /my first gay wedding / homophonic wedding /  we spotted Jimmy the King shuffling down the street with a babe on each arm (and two moist implants under his polo shirt) / moist re-entry / millennium rash / who remembers the following pop groups?...Daniel and the Chimneys, Ra Ra Death Squad, Hippo Chump / artificial hand gestures of the late 15th cent. / flange basket / plenty of buckets of offal / tall story of melting baby / my latest boyfriend is considerate killer /gentlemen in the bath tub / I joined hands with other men who are addicted to salt / pepper pot wife – I killed her!! / bored of being a skeleton / gymnasium hookers or gymnasium lookers / robot trumpet / drunk Wigan fingers / ash tray lover /my girlfriend got turned on by the Fatty Arbuckle footage /cancer straits (1990) / his face smells like leather / sniffing glue all night long /  going on pilgrimage which I might return from one day or I might not / had sex with a man in a bubble/dominant shapes in space/ shape of a porn queen/new French Polynesian girlfriend is making small effigies of her family out  of clay / sex with a dead donkey/ I assume you have actually heard of Paul Zone? / women in the swamp, playing clarinet / Donkey Mouth Jackson / customise your cock / dancing with the milk man / robot sperm / a box full of heavy mammals / adults who enjoy computer games are very childish / bunch of lesbians in  / witch on the underground / pink wish list / my fingers stink of your 38 year-old daughter / walking through town with a bag full of devil’s dandruff / kids with dandruff / my kitten tastes lovely / tense leisure/ big hat for skinny kid / spin the kangaroo / half-eaten banquet / Bean Baby is back in favour / amen artery death / Wolf Man on last train home (sitting next to a drunk bachelor) / kangaroo poems / what can be more beautiful than an honourable death? Mohammed and the fish-man / ‘Antique Death’ is my 33rd favourite ‘The Beatles’ song / perfumed garlic / King of the space age 

Tuesday 23 July 2013

Modern Amerika

'Modern Amerika'

relation ship / rat ship ooze (Casey Affleck is gay) / furry tongue of angel/with his tongue all furry like a bandicoot’s cock / angle never gets drunk (cute) / machine gums / pissed eyeballs  / do you even care about eggs? / look at that new building, it reminds me of flesh egos (1998) / piss detour (1989)/there are a lot of fat bastards on the moon / I  prefer short fat girls between age of 47-50 / cuddly carcass / Olympic-sized kitten

Math Suicide

'Ohio (Who Made U Do Fings Dat U Shouldn't Be Doin'?)'

'Math Suicide'

dump truck psychology / In love with the padre / babies with Bavarian measles / finishing school jaw line / five blue wisdom/here comes Leisure Head / would you like to float above NYC now? / I gotta eat bones (I got candy gums) / nursery jaw line/day 2: Vladimir Putin has ordered the killing of Prince Harry and his beautiful wife ..  / buttered octopus /  doomdsday jazz club / heckled by a dead man / bobcat rock (avid brute) / attractive brute / no I am not an abolitionist / carefree thoughts of newborn humanoid / polished surface of the newborn’s head / sick Mike + the modern drum students / modern eyelids / ..he decided to devote his life to banging his head on a wall / umbrella nuggets / feathered drums / consider him an Asian sensation / butler’s frown / Dylan’s revenge / modern shame / jazz baby on the plinth / in love with a pachyderm

XXX Music

'Weeping into my Pocket (Furry Gravy)'

'Smacked Like a Texan Whore'

'Pretty Invisibility SARS Lunch'
'Apple Tart Christ'

'Lasciviousness Now (and the Free Reign)'

'Crap Adams'




 Bleeding Tom Mills is a geek, and for some reason he is proud of this fact (it hurt my face when i thought of the dripping wax) / the only way to punish Bleeding Tom Mills is to take away his money at the King’s Lynn Beer Festival / the world isn’t real..so says  Paedomorph Paul Bailey / fairly nice looking girls fanning themselves on the 9.15am / I took off my shorts and sat down on the freezing cold train station seat/



Saturday 20 July 2013

We Love Apples

'We Love Apples'

'Madam's Fear of the Night'

oink oink Pee Wee ..jazz 72-143  /they abandoned his coffin and went off to play Nintendo / beautiful bobcat / pie eye pie /arse burger / Paranoid corpse/ hold up your nose against (or to) the future and then stand back and let the wolf kids walk past (without disturbing their bowls of fruit) / inst 01 – stand still for several hours, then pinch your nose to avoid getting a whiff of the rotting corpses /wet teenager having their accelerator period / honey smells like  piss / Sooty is a pansy / occidental fart / animal sister (part rap)/ my six favourite country ‘n’ western groups- ‘Anthrax’, ‘Sepultura’, ‘Extreme Noise Terror’ (other 3 entries have been deleted by Chum Hum) / teenage steam / there is a primal scream in my brain (welcome to accelerator era) / flesh-coloured gypsy/ god  awful riot make me head ache (gorilla glue) / Sooty hands of chimney sweeper / lick your fingers..do they taste of anthrax?/what is tuna made of? / fresh piss / nice bag of fresh pea juice / pub goblin / why does my husband wear panties?/why are babies so hairy? / Beast at the back of the stage / memories of children with square-shaped heads / monitoring the werewolf / kids at adult parties (serving cocktails) / farded werewolf /the fey fauna gang

La La (Shield Yer Eyes From The Terrifying Smile of the Newborn Demon) (S) (2)



















'La La (Shield Yer Eyes From The Terrifying Smile of the Newborn Demon) (S) (2)'

 Pee Wee pansy childish painigns of a backwater visionary / why can’t I have teeth just like yours??/gorilla pickle peadeomorph on last bus home (carrying bag of fried eggs) / Mervy Allen pipe out opinion at 4am  - Bleeding Tom Mills AKA The Laughing Gob is Norfolk’s leading flaneur / fried rejection/ I swooned at the feet of the American wrestler / I will not be dictated to by Hollywood  / bellicose pansy / we raise our arms every time an aeroplane crashes into a significant building / now I am Pewee Wales/ shaved off my toe beard (shaved off my tooth beard) / abandoned horse museum / blinded by the pseudo sun / Teds vs Tommy-Knockers (perfumed troll) / I’m so dumb.. I often ride buses even though I don’t need to go anywhere./I loved you in your sailor boy outfit and so did the Pepper Monkey!! / slim kid in the burger restaurant / The Son of Mother/ Splintered issue (eat cabbage for breakfast) / exploding heads on bus home / tidy up your feet, Young Queen/ I memorised the sermon in an attempt to impress the pastor / please welcome..modern hostage / aren’t you glad you’re you?


Sex Sells






















 Bleeding Tom Mills AKA The Laughing Gob is a pretender to knowledge (sitting in the bus stop with my catamite one one side and a rather attractive Korean bag lady on the other) / Pagan Gravy /three persons know the whereabouts of my wife- and they ain’t spilling no beans / curiously large-headed babies disuturb me quite a bit/ we opened the mummy’s tomb to discover a note saying ‘borrowed:- 1 x mummy –will return in 1 week’ / talking to Japanese gentlemen at the Hitachi factory annual  finger buffet . /Shakespeare’s teeth/I love the way you stroke you feet when contemplating the death of Roy Kinnear/ the black sciences/ dark arts vs light arts/deluded humanoid / lovely sons which don’t deserve having a slag for a mother / my uncle is a fully-qualified worm-charmer (is he really?) / poetry festival love-fest (orgy at the poetry festival)/Ageing Asian Dracula / Dracula’s biscuits – Dracula dips his digestives in a cup of blood..doesn’t he./dogging Olympics / I smelt my fingers and the sweet musty scent reminded me of your hot genitals (yuk museum)/ET has a nice purple head, just like we do / ET took out his packed lunch, which consisted mainly of food her learned to love during his trip to earth/ the man with the disappearing face / lucid dream contained a bit where I was walking around a bombed-out bus depot, trying to find my lost shoes/my dad was the life, and indeed the soul, of every party..i fondly recall the time he  challenged a hairy Hell’s Angel (a real one) to prove that he could balance a full pint of beer on his erection / the he the he/woke up with sleepy eyes and next to a Sleepy Jesus who had manifested himself during the night /  in an underground village which had manifested itself during the night