Monday, 8 July 2013

Woke up to find myself stuck in a spaceship with a small deformed horse and some ex-members of MENSA / careful with that rabid duck, father / dumb women on Mars/25.12.13 – I was forced to eat chicken without the use of cutlery/ my mother’s eyes are Japanese/WW2 pilot movie / question 6:- why is my hat on back-to-front?/Bet Middleton ate my local pastor / my uncle was reasonably proud to be the first black James Bond / Ian Fleming did not write James Bond, I fricking did / my granddad lives in the garden (hey call him Garden Grandad..everyone calls him that; even people who are not related to him) / invisible cavity – man I want to score your sophomore movie..there is a great buzz about it on the ‘internet’ / my grandfather was famous for scoring the classic silent film ‘How I met your mother’ / sometimes it helps to have crippled fingers / sensible whores / dipped my biscuit in the weeping cavity /dipped my finger into the weeping sore / bilious hellion/ that is one angry son-of a-bitch / selfish teeth / an Eric Bristow Christmas / wiggle your chain out of the window / homeless zombie/ men with the future in their eyes/i don't trust you XL sized arms with my baby/homecoming corpse / the deodorant cops / righteous corpse/trying to watch ‘Save the Tiger’ whilst rain water is dripping onto my buck tooth / buck-toothed deodorant salesman / voodoo caboose (we spent most of the first week making voodoo dolls for the pap shango) / dirty-faced angel (AKA drunk angel- my blind teeth) / champagne fingers / put the bones back in the toy box, Neville / creamy dungeon / new papal edict:- every new born catholic baby gets a free piece of wood / you don’t have to wear leather to be a rock star; you don’t have to cut your hair to be a doctor / fear of teeth

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