this is why my fingers taste of apple pie...

YOUNG CHRISTIAN STANDING IN A BUCKET OF FISH HEADS / THE MORE YOU LOOK AT ME THE MORE CHANCE THERE IS OF ME DISAPPEARING / SHALL I REMOVE THE GLUE NOW, SEYMOUR? / DADDY, WHY DO APPLES TASTE THE WAY THEY DO?? / I POURED A LITTLE MORE SUGAR ON THE DAMAGED XMAS TREE / CHICKENS THAT LEARNT TO BARK / I REMOVED MY FATHER CHRISTMAS HAT TO REVEAL A BEAUTIFUL HEAD OF BLOND CURLY LOCKS / MOTHER MILDRED HANGIN' AROUND NASA RECEPTION AREA (WITH A BIG BAG OF MOON DUST..SUPPOSEDLY / WHY IS JANDEK SO WHITE? / BLACK TEETH, WHITE BREASTS / SCREWED BY A TEDDY BOY AT 3.30 AM / WHY DO MY ARMS FEEL SO SEXY? / I WAS IMPRESSED WITH THE LACK OF HAIR ABOVE MICHAEL'S TOP LIP / BOTTOM LIP ANNUAL PRIZE-GIVING FESTIVAL / MATTHEW REMINDS ME OF A RED SNOOKER BALL  / I ASKED MYSELF 'WHY AM I GAY'? / THIS MORNING MY MUD-STAINED BOTTOM WILL NOT BE WASHED / UNCLE SIMON IS AN EMBARASSMENT TO OUR FAMILY, BUT I SECRETLY ADORE THE BASTARD / SOMETIMES MY FINGERS ITCH WHEN I WAKE UP / I COVERED MY SISTER-IN-LAW WITH SMALL SNAIL'S EGGS (FOR ABSOLUTELY NO REASON WHAT SO EVER) / SOMETIMES PERFUMED GORILLAS SEEM ABNORMAL TO ME / I AM THE KING OF THE DEADLY ART OF (DELETED BY USER) / SNIFFIN' GLUE ON THE PENULTIMATE BUS HOME / MILDRED IS A TERRIBLE NAME FOR A SUPER-MODEL / I LOST MY PRECIOUS COPY OF 'BEST OF JANDEK' WHILST DRUNK ON STRONG LIQUOR / WILL YOU KISS ME IF I CHANGE MY NAME TO WILLIAM THE ELDERFLOWER? / BIG-HAIRED SUPER-MODELS ARE HAUNTING MY EVERY WAKING MOMENT /  IF YOU KISS ME I WILL PROMISE TO COOK YOU SOME REALLY NICE FRIED VITTLES NEXT WEEK / I SLIPPED OUT OF MY PYJAMAS AND KISSED THE HEAD OF EVERY SINGLE BACHELOR IN THE ROOM / THE SUGAR-COVERED LESBIANS OF BASINGSTOKE VILLAGE / TOM CRUISE LOOKS A BIT LIKE MY EX-HUSBAND'S BROTHER / MY FEET TASTE OF CHRISTMAS PUDDING / I LOVE TO KISS THE FIST OF THE PEACE-MONGERS / BLEEDING TOM MILLS HATES COMPUTERS / BASINGSTOKE PUSSY / AFRICAN VERBS / BILL CHARLEY IS A GOOD NAME FOR A SMALL BOY / PIECES OF SHEEP LITTER MY FRONT LAWN / I AM THE DEAD FARMER'S ONLY DAUGHTER / HOLD ME, I'M LOVELY